How to talk to girls: Basic Steps to Becoming Awesome at Teasing
Teasing: The Basics of How to Talk To Girls
Happy Halloween Guys!
In the 6 Biggest Misconceptions About Attraction post we discussed how guys like Braddock are awesome at using teasing and push/pull to generate attraction. If you haven’t taken a bootcamp, however, you might be thinking ‘I understand that teasing is good, but HOW do I tease?’
On Lovesystems bootcamps, instructors teach something called ‘trigger words.’ ‘Trigger words’ were invented by Braddock, and they are the absolute best tool to learning how to have more natural and organic conversation in set. They are also great for teaching you how to tease and get good with push/pull. We can’t outline all of ‘trigger words’ here, but I can give you some guidance on how to you should start thinking about teasing.
When learning how to talk to girls, I can assure you 95% of guys you see in the club are either not teasing at all or are not teasing correctly. Have you ever tried teasing a girl, and it just came off as clunky or awkward? Don’t be discouraged. Learning to tease correctly is like learning an instrument. It can be clunky at first, but if you learn to train properly and continue to practice, you gradually develop the skills needed to make music. Today, I’m going to give you some basic steps you can take to get your teasing on point so that you will have girls rolling in the aisles, and consequently becoming super attracted to you. Lets get started!
Basic Steps to Teasing
When a girl tells you something or you observe something about a girl you want to tease, coming up with the tease is a two-step process:
1. Stereotype
2. Tease the second layer/exaggerate
Lets break these steps down.
Step 1- Stereotype
As you master how to talk to girls, you can tease a girl for just about anything: Where she’s from, her job, her hobbies, why she is at the club, etc. Its important to be careful not to tease so hard that you offend the girl, but learning to calibrate your teasing only comes through trial and error. Inevitably, if you are really working hard to learn this, there will be times where girls are going to get pissed off at you. When it happens, don’t worry about it. Just keep in mind that teasing should always be meant to be fun, and never hurtful.
So lets say you are talking to a girl and she says shes from San Francisco and you want to tease that. Step 1 would be to think of some stereotypes about San Francisco and the people who live there.
This part is easy. When thinking of stereotypes, Braddock says a good way to come up with your list is to, ’Close your eyes and imagine your mind is google. Then do a google images search on the thing you want to tease, and list everything you see.’
So for example, some things that come to my mind when I think about San Francisco:
Hippies
Marijuana
Gay pride parades
Golden Gate Bridge
Alcatraz
49ers football team
Left winged politics
You will notice that nothing I listed above is particularly funny in itself. Braddock says that when you’re coming up with stereotypes, its totally fine for the things you come up with to be completely logical. Step 2 is where we start to come up with actual content we will use to tease.
IMPORTANT NOTE
While most guys are able to stereotype, they make the mistake of trying to tease a girl simply by stating the stereotype. DO NOT JUST STATE THE STEREOTYPE
Guy: So where are you from?
Monique: I’m from San Francisco
Guy: Oh you are probably a hippy then
Monique: Um no.
While this isn’t horrendous, notice how there isn’t any edge or much humor to simply stating a stereotype. Undoubtedly, she has heard this line a thousand times before. You’re objective (and what will set you apart from other guys), is going to be your ability to tease the second layer.
Step 2- Tease the Second Layer
Learning to tease beyond simply stating the stereotype is going to be what makes your teasing stand out. Some instructors will call teasing past the obvious stereotype ‘teasing the second layer.’
There are tons of ways to tease the second layer but what I want to focus on in this post is taking the stereotype, blowing it out of proportion, and then putting that blown out of proportion stereotype onto the girl.
So looking at the list we made in step 1, you might be able to see some good categories for building teases. For me, the most obvious stereotype is ‘hippy.’
So I’m going to exaggerate things I know about hippies and put those exaggerated details onto her.
Lets take a look at how I would put this into action:
I open Monique and she responds warmly. We exchange some random banter, and since she’s been warm so far I am confident teasing her would be well received.
Neverender: Where are you from Monique?
Monique: San Francisco
Neverender: Ah San Francisco? Ok that would explain why I saw you trying to form a drum circle by the bar earlier 
Monique: Hahaha! I was not doing that!
Neverender: Look, the music in this club is fine Monique. Aviciii is performing tonight and we don’t need you running around the club trying to put on a hippy jam festival
Monique: Shut up! I’m not a hippy and I love Avicii!
OR
Neverender: So where are you from?
Monique: San Francisco
Neverender: Oh cool, I’m assuming that was your tie-dye van I saw parked outside the club? Hey does that thing come with GPS?
Monique: hahahaha you’re so stupid. It did actually come with GPS, but I needed somewhere to hide my weed so I had it taken out.
In both examples, I can tell based on her reaction that the tease was well received. The theme of her being a hippy is now something I can recycle throughout the night. We go back to having normal conversation. Do some qualification/comfort stuff, and then I’ll randomly bring up the hippy theme again.
So 5 minutes later after she qualifies herself on something cool, and I have related to It I might say something like.
Neverender: But yeah that’s awesome… you know you’re actually pretty cool. I’m glad you took the night off from hugging trees and smoking peace pipes to come hang out.
Monique: I hate you so much
Do you see how much more powerful this is than if we simply stated stuff like
‘Oh you must be a hippy’
‘Oh I bet you smoke marijuana’
‘Oh I bet you are left-winged’
Teasing on the second layer is what will make your teasing awesome.
Braddock is far and away the best when it comes to this stuff. Here are a few examples of his material. Its important to point out that you don’t need to sit at home and memorize these teases like they are routines. While Braddock may use some of the teases listed below over and over with various girls, its coming from a natural place, and even if he hears something unique that most girls don’t say, his teasing muscles are strong enough to where he would be able to come up with funny shit to tease her about on the fly. You want to focus on exercising your teasing muscles to the point where teasing the second layer becomes natural to you.
‘You go to Harvard? That’s awesome. You must be really smart. I bet you can levitate me with your mind.’
‘Ok Katie the banker…we should probably get you home. Its getting late and you’re going to need to be at 100% if you’re gonna close down that orphanage for blind kids tomorrow.’
‘(Braddock has been teasing Nicki on being short all night) Nicki let me ask you something. When you want to get a drink do you have to like run and jump to get up onto the barstool or do you just have a friend help you up there?’
‘(Said to an Asian girl) Yeah so anyway, you are the cutest black girl I’ve met tonight. I’m not attracted to that many black girls but, there is something about you.’
Teasing is a MASSIVE subject, but learning to think about the second layer is the foundation to getting good at this stuff.
For further examples on this I recommend watching a show called Tosh.0. Daniel Tosh’s comedy is all about taking stereotypes and then building off them to tease the second layer. Tosh on Soccer
There’s also a show called ‘Two Broke Girls’ that busts out a clever one liner about every 10 seconds. I don’t like the show much, but they do an awesome job teasing the second layer as well.
What will really make you good at this stuff though is simply practicing coming up with new teases at home all the time, and then going out into field and trying them out. Exercises and practice in field are the keys to becoming great at teasing.
ALRIGHT!
So now you have got a feel for how you should be teasing a girl lets try putting what you have learned into practice.
Try coming up with teases on the categories listed below. If you leave the teases you came up with in the comments section, Braddock and I will be sure to give you our feedback.
Looking forward to hearing your responses!
Categories:
Girl: I am from Texas
Girl: I am a nurse
Girls: We are here for my friends bachlorette party
Remember:
- List the stereotypes associated with the subject you want to tease
- Tease the second layer/exaggerate
With practice you will be amazed at how quickly you can get good at this. Have an awesome Halloween guys!
*Note: Comments posted have to be approved before being published onto the blog. After you post don’t worry if the comment doesn’t come up immediately. We will get it up as quickly as we can.
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Texas: Walker Texas Ranger, guns, trucks, cowboys, oil, bigger, Texas rap culture
- Your from Texas ,you probably drive a Chevy with a gun hanging on your back windshield and you definitely love Walker Texas Ranger Ms. Cowboy.
- Texas, me too. I actually have the horse parked outside. I bet that Ford with the everything is bigger In Texas bumper sticker is yours, uh your such a cowgirl
Nurse: white uniform, caring, the joker, sympathetic, crocs, highly educated, shots
- nurses are like the mos sympathetic people on earth, except the joker in Batman, he fucked up. Oh well, I least I know you’ll look good in crocs when you have to give me a shot
- I love nurses they always have the best outfits. Wait scrubs or 1900 century old fashion uniforms for you? Ill have to say old fahion with pink crocs. You can be the female Patch Adams.
Bachelorette: friends, candy, toys, penises, hotel parties, strippers, clubs
- I love bachelorette parties and for some reason I aways end up getting hierd as the designated Stripper but im not cheap, it’s $4 a dance and a bag of candy that I know you guys carry, the ones with the weird shape
- so you must be the guys who hierd me. You know I also do barmithzas, and bday parties but you guys are the only ones that make me bring candy and toys
awesome post!!
cheers a ton!!
Hi Neverender! Thanks for this post, it answers some of the questions I made about how to be more flexible and smooth in conversation. Good explanation and examples, I will try to exercise on this by using some common girl responses as triggers. And especially addressing the great Braddock, it would be very well received some more affordable option to learn about trigger words, by means of a product, interview series… even more for people who live in Europe. I think people who want to improve on this have no problem in paying a reasonable amount of money for good information that can make you much more confident and resourceful in conversation.
AWESOME Gustavo! Good shit dude! Particularly like your Texas ones and the the ‘I also do bar mitzvahs and bday parties’ when going into the stripper roleplay. NICE!
Girl: I am from Texas
1. Cowboys. Ranches. Rednecks. Fat people.
2.
-(If we’re at a club)So what’s it like finally being out in civilization?
-I know you’re dying for a ho-down but it’s not gonna happen.
Girl: I am a nurse
1. Hot. Neurotic. Long hours. On call all the time.
-What? I thought nurses were supposed to be hot (would only say to hot girls)
-Alright, so now I know who to go to if I trip and fall and get a boo-boo
Girls: We are here for my friends bachlorette party
1. Male strippers. Excessive drinking. General obscurity of bachelorette parties
-Okay, okay, you don’t have to be shy and beat around the bush. I’ll be your guys’ stripper.
i love this! using such advanced/witty teases like these are what will differentiate us from all the other dudes who suck at teasing or dont tease at all. extremely cool and important tool to have in our arsenal! awesome post sir.
Texas
Don’t you need to be drilling oil right now? your car’s running out of gas. oh wait, I guess you could ride a horse instead
For the nurse case it’s difficult to think of a better tease than the one mentioned in “Callbck Humor” LSi 66; the half doctor. I’ve been trying to make my teases hit harder and using the second layer will def help improve it.
Another one might be:
Her – I’m a nurse.
Angel – Oh really, full or part time?
Her – (Whether she’s either nurses are usually pretty busy)
Angel – Yeah its demanding. This is probably your first time out in a while. It’s ok if you have extremely low tolerance, I’ll let the bartender know we’re pouring your drinks in milliounces.
(And/Or later when she’s drinking)
Angel – Hold on there binge drinker! Not everyone has IVs they can hook up to in the morning.
That’s what I came up with, it would help to know if there might be a better way to word it, and also whether or not I might be getting into too many layers with the teasing. Thanks!
These are hilarious. I think sometimes men do tend to oversell, but I’ll tell you that women really do appreciate when someone is genuinely funny and not trying to hard. We also love it when men are chivalrous and have good manners. If you want to sweep a girl off her feet, send her flowers after a few dates. They don’t need to be a dozen long stem red roses, but something that says you like her and you mean business.
Girl: I am from Texas
Big Trucks(with truck nuts), arrogant oil rich people, alcoholic on beer(including alcoholic wife), Guns, Cowboy , think that only Texans matter,
1- Oh! btw there was a hammered gay couple taking pictures and licking your truck nuts, if i was you, i would go shoot them with my colt before the back of my truck ends up being a cum dumpster. Just sayin!
-(Follow up later on) Does those truck nuts exist to complete dildo packages? I love the fact that you guys are very precise and adequate with the stuff u make.. (i vary this with marriage/divorce roleplay that it will good sexual education for our daughter……)
- Blame her on the high gas prices, tell her that i paid indirectly for this purse and i want my money back.
- Tell my buddies when they come that she was threatening me that she’ll shoot me if i leave, so i’m stuck
-Threatening her of filing a sexual harrassement case if she makes me make out with her one more time by threatening me.
- Misinterpret that she is disrespecting me/not acknowledging me/treating me like shit just because i’m a poor immigrant from “some country overseas”
Girl: I am a nurse
Crocs, needles, nurse call button, sexy fantasy nurse(hot), serves shitty food, adjusts the bed in the room.
- You know, i’m really afraid for those elderly that u treat(she asks why) because u may cause serious heart attacks, especially for those 70 year old wankers. (pull)
(Call back humour everytime she does something sexy i like i tell her not to do it in front of the people being treated)
- Steels Xanax and Vicodin and take them in front of friends to look cool/ steels them to support her gang/(relates to other teases)
- Did it cz she has experience with sticking heroin needles, she thought it was fuckin easy, and she would show those Mothafakas how to be a real G
- Did it cz she’s a psycho and likes making people feel pain.
- She should stop spanking little kids… fuckin perv
Girls: We are here for my friends bachlorette party
-small penises, toys, candy’s, whoring around”for the last time”, turning guys into dancing retards with extra missing chromosomes, flirty, girls night out
- How many times should i tell u to stop wearing my penis doll as a necklace!
- She has “pussyadis” which is a flu that consists of turning men into pussies, with extra retardation, so they start doing all the retarded stuff, and i tell her to go spray it on some dumb guy in the corner.
(keep on telling her to get away, because she is toxic, and that pussyadis is transferred by kisssing and being hot)
- Ur sweet little flirty touches won’t get me hard enough for me to do X…
I really thank you guys for posting this amazing thread, plus from my unproffessionnal pov i think this can be a role playing exercice cz a lot of roleplays came to mind while doing it!
Here’s my thing, i came 1 year ago from a country that is butt fucked with no sort of lubrication, not even a small spit. So i really started to get the vibe in here, but i don’t know much about stereotypes of countries, general culture, cz u can count on your fingers the movies that i watched, and the places that i travelled. Is there any reference u guys can give me for me to know stereotypes? and what are some must see movies?
P.S. I’m 18 years old, so it’s impossible for me to travel the world right now before getting my degree done.
Thank you…
Your happy ending,
Crystamin